Every time I talk about negotiation, I encounter the 3A trap. What I mean is, someone in the audience invariably describes the 3A Trap — as defined by William Ury in The Power of Positive No — as her experience of negotiating in the workplace. The 3A’s stand for: Accommodate: You give in. You say […]
Earlier this week, I had the delightful privilege of leading Negotiation Prowess workshop for women grad students at Columbia University. It was fun, and I dare say a success! The individual questions from attendees were specific and challenging, and I’ve been mulling on them ever since. Which made me see that there were two key […]
How could you do this to me? I slammed the door shut. NO! I’m not coming out of this room! I was sixteen years old, holding myself hostage in the bedroom, wailing and crying. Mom brought her boyfriend home, unannounced, late at night, when I wasn’t ready to accept any of that. It was a […]
Photo by the talented Melissa Maples Hi Jamie, Thanks for publishing Negotiating at Work webinar on The Muse. I’m not sure if it’s appropriate for me to say that a raise would make me happier and want to work even harder. How can my getting a raise make the company tangibly better, given it takes […]
Nothing speaks louder than action. So take some time during this season of frenzied feasting and shopping to plan and practice your big scary ask. Take action on building your negotiation prowess. Your future self will thank you. The role-play is designed to be applicable to a wide range of situations, so you can use […]
Fall is here, meaning winter is just around the corner. Which kills me, every year. The cold weather and shorter days trigger a response in my body that turns me into a stiff, chronically fatigued and antisocial grouch. I hate it. Every winter I battle the impulse to give in and stay in, bundle myself […]
What if you accepted the first offer for a new job without even blinking an eye at the lower-than-market salary figure. Worse yet, what if you didn’t even know you lowballed yourself? I’ve made this costly mistake a few times early in my career.
First. I’m stealing from a monk. I read this New Yorker profile on Ittetsu Nemoto, a Zen Buddhist monk who works with suicidal people in Japan. He is a life coach, in the ultimate and literal sense. His workshops are near-life experiences for those who want to die. I read the article twice, second time […]